ELISSA Dalton, 39, is a nurse and podcaster and lives in Indiana, USA, with her son Gage, 17, and husband Jason, 39, who works at a radio station.
Here, she reveals how she’s spent over £6,000 shopping in her sleep and how she manages living with parasomnia.
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Seeing the three giant images of myself in my underwear, I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.
I knew these wall canvases weren’t a secret gift from my husband – because it was me that had created, ordered and paid for them, all while I was fast asleep.
I’ve had sleep problems all my life. At five years old, I’d drop off in bed but wake up on the kitchen floor.
When I was 14, my mum suddenly left the family and then my dad died, so I moved in with my grandma, and that’s when things got worse.
I’d have entire conversations with her in my sleep. I didn’t believe it when she told me what I’d done – until she recorded me one night and played it back.
In May 2015, I met my husband Jason on Tinder. We fell in love and moved in together three months later. I was so relieved that my sleep issues didn’t put him off and we were soon married.
One day, a parcel from eBay arrived containing a pair of gold sunglasses. Baffled, I logged into my account and saw that I’d bid £26 on them in the middle of the night.
We laughed about it, but had no idea this was just the beginning.
Between 2015 and 2018, I bought six more things in my sleep. They were all inexpensive clothes, so I was more amused than anything.
Then in June 2019, when I graduated from my nursing qualification and began working, my sleep-shopping habit erupted.
First came more than 30 pairs of tennis shoes and loads of socks. Parcels arrived filled with sparkly miniskirts and pleather dresses, despite the fact that I lived in trousers.
Jason and I joked that ‘asleep Elissa’ and ‘awake Elissa’ were two very different women.
It didn’t stop at clothes. Over the months, bags, hair products, 18 eyeshadow palettes and boxes of toilet rolls arrived.
Sometimes I’d have a sense I’d done something in my sleep, other times I had no clue.
Jason was incredibly patient. Together, we tried deleting all the shopping apps and removing payment methods from my phone, then moving my devices away from my bed or even hiding them.
But I’d always find them and I’d memorised my credit card numbers.
By late 2019 it was spiralling and I started therapy.
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I learned that my shopping was a response to losing my parents and I was diagnosed with a parasomnia (disruptive sleep-rated disorder).
Buying things made me happy, and I was chasing that feeling, even in my sleep.
Things improved for a while, but working in intensive care during the pandemic was so stressful that my symptoms spiked again.
What is non rapid eye movement (NREM) parasomnia?
Angela’s condition occurs in around 15 per cent of the population and is usually seen those aged eight to 12, according to Science Direct.
The Sleep Foundation says NREM parasomnia happens in the first stages of sleep and is known as a “disorder of arousal”.
It is “characterised by episodes of incomplete awakening, limited responsiveness to other people attempting to intervene or redirect the sleeper, and limited awareness during the episode”, the site adds.
In most cases, those who experience the condition do not remember much, if any, of their episodes.
There are five types of the disorder:
- Confusional arousals: During a confusional arousal, a sleeper acts disoriented and may sit up and look around but does not leave the bed.
- Sleepwalking: Sleepwalking occurs when people get out of bed while still asleep but exhibit limited awareness or responsiveness to their surroundings. They may engage in other behaviours, such as sorting clothes. Sleepwalking can also lead to injuries if the individual loses their balance or collides with other objects.
- Night terrors: People who experience night terrors often cry, scream, or make nonsensical sounds in their sleep and are difficult to awaken. A night terror episode can last a few minutes or up to 40 minutes.
- Sleep-related sexual abnormal behaviors: Known colloquially as “sexsomnia”, this parasomnia is characterised by sexual behaviours during sleep, such as masturbation, initiation of sexual intercourse, and sexual noises.
- Sleep-related eating disorder: This is characterised by episodes of dysfunctional eating that occur after arousal from sleep. Most people with this condition exhibit limited responsiveness during their eating episodes and have little to no memory of the events. Potential concerns include ingestion of toxic substances, injuries from cooking or preparing food, and physiological effects of unhealthy or excessive eating.
Then in late 2020, I saw an email from Chanel thanking me for my order. My blood ran cold as I tried to access the account I’d somehow created the night before, as I knew Chanel bags cost thousands.
It was the only time Jason lost it, and I understood why. Luckily, it turned out I’d bought Chanel logo cotton make-up removal pads that cost £18. I almost fainted with relief.
There have been lighter moments, too. In December 2022, I somehow turned pictures from a boudoir photo shoot of me in my undies into three giant wall canvases.
They cost £85 and were obviously not refundable.
It felt liberating to speak about it and made me feel less alone.
Elissa
Now they hang in our bedroom. In summer 2023, I bought 1,000 cat stickers, when I don’t even like cats, and a badge for my nurse’s uniform that says: ‘I’m dead inside.’ It’s definitely not suitable for work!
Over the years, I’ve spent more than £6,000 while asleep, on things I haven’t been able to return. Thankfully, I haven’t sleep shopped in a few months.
In February, I created a podcast with Jason called The Adventures Of E, and have shared my sleep shopping story with the world.
It felt liberating to speak about it and made me feel less alone. Now the podcast has become my therapy and has helped me see the funny side.
Read more on the Scottish Sun
After all, I may always do this, but at least ‘asleep Elissa’ buys lots of things on sale!”
- Listen to The Adventures Of E on Apple Podcasts.
BTW
Around 4% of adults worldwide have a diagnosed parasomnia.*
Parasomnias can include sleepwalking, sleep eating and sleep shopping.**
Sources: *Patient *Sleepfoundation.org
